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Let me tell you upfront that to understand the Filipino family, one must first realize that the Filipino family is anything BUT typical. It is as intricate as it is beautiful and to make it fit into any conventional definition would be like trying to fit a round peg in a square hole.

Neither Matriarchal Nor Patriarchal

Whereas some societies consider family leadership roles as either matriarchal or patriarchal, the Filipino family varies from family to family. Some have a more matriarchal set- up while some have the opposite. While its true that families

Sibling Heirarchy

Relationships among siblings in a typical Filipino family observe a specific hierarchy. The older brothers or “Kuyas” (pronounced koo- ya) and older sisters “Ates” (pronounced Ah- Te) have moral ascendancy over the younger ones even until adulthood and have tendencies to be overprotective if not meddlesome of their younger siblings. Don’t be surprised if a Filipino consults his or her older brothers (and yes sometimes even their other siblings) before making important life decisions. It’s not that we can’t make decisions on our own, its just that the opinion of siblings matter a lot to a Filipino. Generally, ties are close among brothers and sisters.

On Adulthood and Leaving Home

It is not unusual for young Filipinos to stay with their parents until they decide to settle down. Typically, the child who marries last is left to care for their parents. This just shows how Filipinos are big on family values and consider family their top priority. Extended families are created when either the parents move in with one of their children who has already married or a child who does choose to marry stays on with his or her parents with his/ her spouse and children.

Marriage

Marriage is always a big deal to Filipino families. The new member of the family (depending of course if everyone approves; and yes the approval of the family is always a big factor in choosing a lifetime partner) is absorbed into the family and becomes one of their own. The same hierarchy among siblings applies, even spouses respect the advice from older members of the family.

Extended Family

Owing to the fact that siblings are close in a Filipino family, it should come as no surprise that Aunts or “Titas” and Uncles “Titos” play a vital role in the life of every Filipino. They are respected as one would respect ones own parents and their opinion is valued just as much. In some Filipino households where two or more families live under one roof, this kind of relationship is more pronounced. However, even if living separately the relationship still exists. It is not unusual for a Filipino to have an aunt or uncle they are close to and look to for advice and support. Though some might consider the many authority figures one has to deal with aside from one’s own parents, the role of extended family adds to the unique Filipino support system.

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This article on Filipino Family Profile is written by Monique Musni.